Episode 123: Star Trek is Screwed

Indeed it is, and has been for so long that the title of this episode has been baking since 2013 when Ian first suggested it. Things weren't much better then, when Ian thought of the idea because a certain Time Lord's 50th Anniversary was coming up. The Doctor had bunting in his Tardis, cake and a War Doctor incarnation played by John Hurt to celebrate.

At almost the same time Star Trek was coming up to its 50th. What did Kirk et al. get? A re-sequel of a re-boot and then forgotten for a couple of years. Then, like a zombie a second sequel to the re-boot came along as well as a shiny new series unavailable except via extortion in the country of its birth. Star Trek did not have the best birthday or aftermath of birthday.

Has it ever been thus? The plug was pulled on Classic Star Trek but it wouldn't die, resurrected in the girdle-clad flesh to shamble on to cinema screens in competition with Star Wars. Then brought back to television and it seemed the rough years were over. Until, three patchy spin offs down the line, we crashed headlong into the shuffling embarrassment of awkwardness that was Enterprise, along with the crushingly awful Nemesis and that appeared to be it.

But you shouldn't count your tribbles until they've been to the vet for neutering (no, seriously). There was the reboot, which was delayed in release so long it looked like it might just get shelved and then... well, here we are, spore drives and a movie franchise that may, possibly, have flatlined. Is this any way to run a Space Federation? Join the 80s kids in their final show for this season and let the moaning commence.

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/206StarTrekEditFinal/2-06-Star-Trek-Edit-Final.mp3

This episode features an excerpt from Cutting To The Chase by the outstanding Kai Engel.

Episode 108: And Now, The End Is Near

SPOILER WARNING! This show is about the ends of shows. So the topic of conversation is necessarily spoiler-heavy. Listen with caution!

You had to know it was on its way. There's only one year left in the Noughties, those final Top 5s and we're a mere 7 letters from the end of the alphabet.

All that remains is for the kids to sweep up, arrange the barstools neatly and turn out the lights. Cue the emotional piano music, like all great shows the 80s Kids is winding up to the big finish.

So, before we take that last step into the arena of finality, why not take the opportunity to get all beardy that one last time?

In a conclusion to the "navel-gazing" strand of the cast Leo and Ian talk about show finales. They go hunting for the common threads in that most elusive of beasts: the satisfying conclusion.

"Lost" is bound to come up again, as it does, but there's also a look at "Star Trek: TNG", "Buffy", new "BSG" "Fringe", "Blakes 7", "Babylon 5", "Twin Peaks" and "The Shield" among others.

So as the roundabout slows try not to get anything in your eye. You can rest assured that the kids aren't going to go out in an "everybody dies" toys from pram kind of a finale.

Incidental Music by incompetech.com



Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/Episode108AndNowTheEndIsNear/108-And-now-the-end-is-near.mp3

Episode 64: The New Arc Shows - Buffet The Episode Slayer

And then 'Buffy' happened and somehow TV was just so much more interesting. But why? This week the 80s Trio tackle this and other questions as we delve into what was on the goggle box in the late 90s. Turns out 'Buffy' and 'Angel' aren't in fact all that ground breaking when you take it apart and look at the pieces but the whole hung very well together and it is the show that finally convinced the world that Story arcs could work.

Not that everyone was convinced, with shows like 'Mutant X', 'Voyager' and 'Sliders' still very much clinging to Roddenberry's great end credits reset button, but these are its dying days. Like a building storyline ending in a climax a wave of new shows came thundering in ready to embrace story progress like 'Charmed' or the sleazy and surreal 'Lexx' ... or for that matter the decade stomping 'Stargate'.

The UK also shone brightly as vampire lethal sunlight for the briefest of moments with the dearly missed and almost forgotten 'Ultraviolet', and the same channel that gave us that also gifted as the nerd joy that was Simon Pegg's 'Spaced.' Oh for sure, the late 90s had it's awful piles of crap like 'Andromeda' and the truly turgid 'Millennium' but overall the decade rounds off in interesting shape.

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/064Late90sTV/064%20-%20Late%2090s%20TV.mp3

Episode 62: 1996 - It's Not Me, It's You

And so the gang arrive at 1996 where the power of 90s mediocrity seems at its height with slew of below par action movies. Like a failing marriage people seem to be putting in the effort and saying all the right things but the magic just isn't there. 'Eraser', 'Independence Day', 'Broken Arrow', 'Dragonheart' and the like just don't seem to have any real shelf life.

In an effort not to get lost in another hour of moaning the 80s Kids try to remember some of the gems up front like 'From Dusk Till Dawn', "Star Trek First Contact', 'The Frighteners' and 'The Craft'... but even here favor isn't universal. Perhaps it's a year to enjoy smaller scale films like 'Trainspotting' or 'Fargo' as these seem to be the more iconic survivors. Oh well. Press on we must! And we take what pleasure we can pointing out the rising sun on the horizon.

It's not that we hate 1996... we just upon reflection we feel indifferent about it. Apologies for the variable sound quality of Ian this week, this is due to technical issues with the recording and wasn't obvious when the show was being taped.

Incidental music by Kevin Macleod of incompetech.com

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/0621996-Itsnotmeitsyou/062%20-%201996.mp3

Episode 54: 1994 - Mary Shelly's Pulp Fiction And Other Comic Books

It's hard not to sum up this '1994' Episode as 'Just another one in the 90s' and saying it with a deep sigh. So to shake things up a little we open with Leo's thesis on the state of comic books in the 90s and the result film offerings we have to enjoy this year, "The Crow" and the "The Mask" are the more well known adaptions, "Time Cop" was a surprising adaptation, "Blankman" was not an adaption of anything other than one man's Nerd-phobia that never should have seen the light of day and "The Fantastic Four" which didn't. Which is a shame we feel.

'Was this a good year to be doing a Media Course with Film studies?' Ian asks, remembering back to that fateful year when he and Leo were doing just that. Oh the sweet memories of arguing over "Mary Shelly's Frankenstein" with a lecturer. And of course "Pulp Fiction" the movie that enchanted film students of the period, much to their current shame.

Sure, we might have bitter words for Tarantino now, but as a film in it self what do we make of it? "Natural Born Killers" was Oliver Stone's bastardized Tarantino script, which induced a bitter headache in Leo. Good times.

Onward we go for our action hit with Schwarzenegger's "True Lies" to the glee of Justin and Stallone's "Specialist" which no one can remember in any detail at all. Then they all hurry past "Speed". Ian beams up to the doomed Enterprise D to give a good telling off to all involved in "Star Trek Generations." "Stargate" And "Leon" were also this year and we note their presence as their long term effects were not felt or appreciated at the time.

Also a glut of 90s turkey is ready for our gang to eat with "Street Fighter" and "Blown away". We round off by musing on "Interview with a Vampire" which apparently is not as good as people thought at the time ... and really that sums up the 90s in a nut shell.

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/0541994MaryShellySPulFictionAndOtherComicBooks/054-1994-mary-shelly_s-pul-fiction-and-other-comic-books.mp3

Episode 53: The Wasteland of early 90s TV

This week our Trio rummage deep into their old, dog eared copies of the TV Times and cast their minds back to the Genre TV series of the early 90s. For the UK it was a poor offering, having axed Dr Who the BBC deemed it unnecessary to replace it with anything. Red Dwarf seemed the only game in town, that and the cripplingly dire "Crime Traveler" or the misshapen "Bugs". Science fiction seemed to bubble out on anything but actual drama, surviving on game shows like "Interceptor" or "Crystal Maze."

The doctrine was clear, post Star Wars people expected special effects with their Sci Fi and TV couldn't do that, it was American imports like "Star Trek - The Next Generation" or do without. Thankfully Next Gen was prospering quite well, along with "X Files" and any other half way decent Genre show on Sky Satellite channels. For terrestrial viewers they had to make do with the lack lustre also rans like "Sea Quest" or the 'little low budget show that could', "Babylon 5".

The thing is America was also having a hand in special effects lite fantasy shows like "Early Edition" or "Quantum Leap" which frankly made a mockery of the idea Genre TV was too expensive. Anyway ... "New Adventures of Superman", "Hercules" and "Xena" also rolled about being objects of enjoyment for at least some period of their run. But really this is the bit in history that TV makers of the future would refer to as "Before Buffy" and after that everything changed. But that's a story for another time. For the moment it's very much make do and mend.

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/053TheWastelandOfEarly90sTv/053-the-wasteland-of-early-90s-tv.mp3

Episode 46: 1991 - Judgment Day For The Prince Of Thieves

You know it's going to be one of those years when even Captain Kirk feels like calling it a day and retiring. Meanwhile on the planet Zeist the natives are restless and children are hallucinating Rik Mayall to the amusement of no one.

Even Peter Pan is a bit rubbish in 1991, having decided he wanted to leave Neverland and grow up to be the none zany version of Robin Williams, actually zany Robin Williams can't even be found in a Terry Gilliam movie. That's 1991 for you.

What else did this year have? LA Story? Naked Lunch? Oh dear … Lets pack it in all and go counter culture, bond with our friends over extreme sports and robbing banks with Keanu Reeves who for his crimes is killed a sent to hell, his only chance to escape is to beat Death a twister. Then the Rapture happens but no one saw it. But all is not lost, flying in to rescue the year is the Rocketeer and teleporting in from the future is a cyborg assassin reprogrammed to be a babysitter much to the joy of all.

Hannibal Lecter arrives to collect his academy award before taking Jodie Foster out for dinner. Don't tell me 1991 not worth fighting for! Because it's true, everything I do, I do it for you.

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/0461991JudgmentDayForThePrinceOfTheives/046-1991-Judgment-Day-for-The-Prince-of-Theives.mp3

Episode 38: 1989 - Greg Evigan Vs Batman Vs Slipstream Vs Justin's Sanity Vs Shatner Vs God

This week our trio (+ wife) tackle the films of 1989. They brave serious threat to life and limb by gushing over James Cameron once again, fortunately this director has surely peaked with the 'Abyss' and so we confidently predict we won't have to prattle on endlessly about him in the 90s.

Oh wait…

Meanwhile Timothy Dalton seeks an unregulated killing in his final Bond film and Justin's head explodes with the inanity of 'Slipstream'. DC's 'Batman' spreads his dark rubbery wings and begins his cinematic crusade for justice while Marvel's 'Punisher' goes full Dolph Lundgren.

Sue again recalls fondly 89s timey wimey air disaster romance puzzle 'Millennium' while Ian sighs “BOHICA” as he tries to enjoy 'Star Trek V.' Leo then takes us on a whistle stop tour of 89's action movies before formally identifying the mutilated corpse of 'Erik the Viking'. These are the last films of the 80s and this is our survivor’s tale.

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/038Films1989GregEviganVsBatmanVsSlipstreamVsJustinSSanityVsShatnerVsGod/038-Films-1989-Greg-Evigan-vs-Batman-vs-Slipstream-vs-Justin_s-sanity-vs-Shatner-vs-God.mp3

Episode 34: Year Of The Biscuit - Films 2013/2014 A Look Back And A Look Ahead

Emerging from the flaming wreckage that was 2013 come three striding silhouettes. Two of them somewhat portly. These are the 80s Kids and during the somewhat lengthy inquest that follows the trio reflect on the films of the year just gone.

For all his talk about Iron Man 3 Leo still clutches his Thor 2 hammer most fondly, Ian still clings to his battle worn Jaeger as it sinks below the surface of the top 10 grossing films of the year and Justin wishes he really hadn't listened to all the nay sayers and had actually gone to see “Oz the Great and Powerful" instead of "Star Trek Into Darkness". But with their mourning for 2013 over with the 'Revengeful Three' look ahead to 2014.

Leo ruminates on coming Marvel Films, Justin wonders what's with all the Bible films in the pipe line and Ian lays the foundations for the year of the baked savoury consumed best with tea or coffee. The Year of the Biscuit starts HERE!

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/034YearOfTheBiscuitTheFilmsOf2013And2014ALookBackAndALookAhead/034-Year-of-the-Biscuit-The-films-of-2013-and-2014-a-look-back-and-a-look-ahead.mp3

Episode 32: Pre Christmas Indulgences

It's the week before Christmas and the 80s Kids turn their minds to a most vexing topic. Films that they like that they are fully aware are hated by most of the rest of the world. Some choices have even caused divides within the group. This leaves the discussion to proceed along two paths.

One, what redeeming quality does someone find in something most people agree to be drivel, and why do people hate movie/tv series x quite so much? Topics as diverse as Star Trek Voyager, Lady In The Water, Aliens vs Predator, Resident Evil and the Underworld franchise are on the table for discussion. Nobody mention guilty pleasures!

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/032PreChristmasIndulgences/032-Pre-Christmas-Indulgences.mp3

Episode 30: 1986 - Howard The Duck And Other Resignation Issues

In an effort to save Ian from resigning in protest over the imminent discussion about the movie hence forth known only as “The George Lucas Duck Thing”. The whole team (Sue included) rally round to nurse him through the delights and joys of 1986's other film offerings. Like a quartet of greedy pigeons they take it in turns to peck away at 86's selection box and reminisce about such delights as Labyrinth, Flight of the Navigator, Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, Aliens, Big Trouble in Little China, The Golden Child and the many other worthy experiences this year has to offer.

Then they pick over the bones as they get down to the dregs with Solarbabies and Wraith. Anything really than talk about that “The George Lucas Duck Thing”. But in the end, with support from Leo, Justin and Sue, Ian agrees with them that Sylvester Stallone's 'Cobra' is probably a worse offence to common decency than anything Lucas did that year.

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/0301986HowardTheDuckAndOtherResignationIssues/030-1986-Howard-the-Duck-and-other-Resignation-Issues.mp3

Episode 22: The 'M' Word

While Justin's away enjoying fame and fortune Ian & Leo are joined by Sue to talk about the recent hot topic of misogyny at the movies. It's been a summer when the 'm' word has been bandied about in connection with various movies, notably Star Trek Into Darkness and Riddick.

So we decided it was time to invite the wrath of the internet and blather our opinions (others of equal value are available) on the topic while there was a woman in the room. Somebody is about to be wrong on the internet.

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/022TheMWord/022-The-M-Word.mp3

Episode 19: 1982 - Everything Happening All At Once

You won't believe your eighties at the gems up for discussion in this week's cast. Indeed the kids themselves are bowled over by the sheer cinematic variety on display.

1982 was the year of The Thing, Poltergeist, Tron and Wrath of Khan. In no year previously could these be considered the frosting on a giant movie cake, so it just goes to show 1982 was a veritable cornucopia of cinematic goodness.

So join us to find out if Blade Runner is just misunderstood, if ET really is all that and speculate as to whether the Dark Crystal is suitable entertainment for children of any age as the 80s kids get blown away by the awesome might of '82


Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/0191982EverythingHappeningAllAtOnce/019-1982-Everything-Happening-All-At-Once.mp3

Episode 11: 1979 - Out On A High

1979... It was a year surprisingly full of noteworthy cinematic moments. So full, in fact, that it's added eight minutes to the run time of the cast. From the Black Hole, to Phantasm, to Star Trek, to Alien and beyond there was a whole heap of stuff happening in '79 it's a wonder that the 80s didn't suffer from some kind of performance anxiety.

Even so, the end of the 70s was like a universe in which the world of film was rudely torn asunder, alongside some big studio projects that traded strongly on existing properties and accepted wisdom were a number of breakaway hits that would help to shape and define the edge of the decade to come.

It's the final hors d'ouevre before we tuck into the decade for which this podcast was named and the trestle tables of this cinematic smorgasbord are groaning under the weight. Best grab a paper plate and pile it high.


Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/01179OutOnAHigh/011-79-Out-On-A-High.mp3

Episode 3: The Summer Of ?

For those tuning in expecting the 70s we are afraid they have been delayed a week. The reason being that, it being the latter end of May, with two massive summer releases already in the wind there could not be a better time to ask what the immediate future holds.

This summer is a strange one, for certain, we've already enjoyed Iron Man 3 and Star Trek Into Darkness and it's not even June. There's still four months worth of stuff to come but what could possibly beat these mighty franchises into submission? Man of Steel? Pacific Rim? or something unexpected? Could our favourite movie of the summer season end up being an outlier? The Purge? or Riddick? (Leo is really, really a huge Riddick fan, time to get nervous).

Join the 80s Kids for a whirlwind of prejudice, anticipation, expectation and speculation after which the summer will never seem the same again.



Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/003TheSummerOfQueryMark/003-The-Summer-Of-Query-Mark.mp3